is this you?
He looks strangely familiar
Who hacked my Facebook?
Oh gee this is getting out of hand! What next? Do y’all have my private nudes too?
LMFAO (yes comment length bot, the body is clear and this is a complete sentence)
I’ve got the nudes! Please send me 1 BILLION bitcoins or I will release these to the wider world
GBB is a sadist!
My secret pastime has been exposed!